


Christmas Isn't Logical

by autisticromana (eloralouistra)



Category: CIA (Big Finish Audio), Gallifrey (Big Finish Audio)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-24
Updated: 2014-05-24
Packaged: 2018-01-26 09:31:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 541
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1683479
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eloralouistra/pseuds/autisticromana
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A couple of young CIA agents get distracted from their mission by a strange alien celebration.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Christmas Isn't Logical

**Author's Note:**

> A late Yuletide/on time birthday gift for the wonderful stormsbreadth.tumblr.com

"This must be one of the most bizarre alien celebrations I’ve ever seen," Vansell comments, staring around at the displays of lights, decorating walls and windows and hung across the street.

His field partner, Narvin, scowls irritably. “Why did our fugitive have to crash  _here_? This planet is enough of the pain even when they’re not celebrating  _Christmas_.” He says the word as if it’s offensive. “What’s it even for, anyway?”

 "The birth of an important religious figure, apparently. Although by this century, there’s a much larger focus on gift giving and spending time with family."

Narvin raises an eyebrow.

"At the Academy I had a friend with a certain fondness for Earth."

"So you’ve told me."

"I may have picked up a few things. I don’t recall him ever mentioning quite how ridiculous it was, though. I expected the decorations to be at least  _slightly_  tasteful.”

"Dreadful, isn’t it? They’re even putting lights on their trees," says Narvin, staring at the tree in the middle of the square.

"Oh, the trees are part of the celebration, too. In fact, that one’s probably only here for Christmas. They even put them in their  _houses_.”

Narvin shudders. “This planet really is primitive. They really don’t mind putting trees in their homes? Do they know how unhygienic trees are?”

"I assume not."

They walk on in silence for a few microspans. Vansell shivers at the cold, wishing Humans would grasp the logic of building heat regulated domes around their populated areas.

"So what else do you know about Christmas?" Narvin asks, eventually.

"Getting interested in Earth customs now? I should introduce you to Theta Sigma," Vansell teases, and is rewarded with another scowl.

"Since we’re here, it might be sensible to try to blend in a little."

He shrugs. “It snows every Christmas, I believe. Which is odd, considering that the people of this century don’t have technology advanced enough to control their weather.” He wouldn’t even mind the lack of domes if they’d only develop that, he thinks.

His field partner frowns. “So it happens by chance at the same point every year, with nothing influencing the weather? Coincidentally, at the very same time as the anniversary of the birth of their religious figure? I hate to say it, but I think your friend may have been feeding you some false information.”

"I’m very willing to concede that he might have got a lot wrong - he was never particularly good at research - but looking at the evidence, he does seem to be correct. Everyone here has a preoccupation with snow. I haven’t seen one Christmas advert not to feature any.

"But a coincidence that big -"

"Maybe Earth actually _is_  interesting after all.”

Narvin stares at him. “Please tell me you don’t actually believe that.”

He sighs. “Even if it was, I found out far more about it than can possibly be healthy at the Academy. Come on, let’s find that fugitive and get off this planet as soon as possible.”

"Your best suggestion all day," Narvin agrees. "Preferably before we have to find out whether it’s going to snow or not."

They both sigh in distaste as a crowd passes them, loudly wishing them a Merry Christmas, and continue down the street.


End file.
